The Responses my Eye Received at Convuluted Moments

I was immediately surprised and comforted by how welcoming and motivated the womyn were when we were settled into our room. It was obvious that they wanted to be there and they brought so much energy to the class. I was so grateful for their openness to tell their stories and share their opinions, even if they weren’t the most popular ideas. I was impressed by how well two womyn in particular, one I will call Claire, and the other I will refer to as Margaret tried to navigate their own ideas and knowledge about Katrina, as well as welcoming and encouraging new ideas from us. Though there were well-thought out and courageous arguments about agency, responsibility, racism, classicism, and the different ways they effect whether or not people are convicted of a crime, how long someone spends in prison, and other related issues, there was definitely a strange hierarchy. The womyn debated and divulged the different circumstances that led to where they are. In many ways, these womyn know these issues more than a lot of the people teaching. The womyn compared their own stories of struggling to find food, a home, and a comfortable place to sleep at night with those of the people who experienced Hurricane Katrina. The parallels and brutal honesty was difficult to witness and be apart of.

At the same time, some of the Bryn Mawr students had the privilege and opportunity to learn about some of the larger, long-term repercussions of Hurricane Katrina. In many ways, this was when the divides seemed so large. Though they knew that people of color were left to drown, to freeze, and without food or water for days, who am I as a white womyn to convey these stories? I do not know these people or their experiences, but my struggle to relate can be problematic. The race/class/experiential/educational gap sometimes felt overwhelming. Because of privilege, education, being white, access to daily news and so many other benefits that I have, there was an obvious “book knowledge gap.” I struggled with sharing what I had read about how the educational system for people of color and lower-income whites changed dramatically after Hurricane Katrina, and not preaching. How can I introduce new information without sounding like an expert or someone who has the only right perspective? How can I help create a space to integrate the different forms and kinds of knowledge?

In many ways, though there definitely were some guidelines and structure, there was plenty of space for the anxieties and tensions that the womyn were feeling to be expressed. It was quite informative and powerful to hear the stories and faces behind many facts and figures that I have heard and studied. It was difficult to maneuver between structure and free-flowing space. How much are white people controlling a space when we give guidelines or instructions? How much did the power dynamics change people’s opinions, what they felt comfortable saying, what was unspoken?

One statement I heard several times that continued to shock, confuse, and upset me was “at that time I was homeless” or “when I was looking for a place to stay.” These two repeated phrases seemed to be harder to swallow every time they were spoken. Questions bounced in my head, how did you get to that place? How many options were offered to you? Was there another choice or can we and how can we create one?