February 6, 2015 - 21:23
I made the brilliant decision of spending half an hour on the balcony yesterday when it was absolutley frigid outside. I spent the first 10 minutes pondering my inevitable death. Somehow, my mind wandered from snow to the cold, to what might happen if I were to fall asleep on the balcony. After that, it was all downhill. I went straight from thinking about how I was so exhausted I could fall asleep on the spot, to thinking about getting lost and forgotten and it just wasn't a happy time. Then, a group of little children ran by, and for anyone that knows me even remotely well, they know that more than anything at all in this world, I gain extreme happiness from being around children. I spent the next 20 minutes feeling warm and happy inside because the children sledding were so ecstatic (although I did question their parents motives in letting their children sled in the bitter cold).
I thoroughly appreciated how distant yet how close the balcony was to real life. It was far enough to not be able to differentiate between the tree branches adjacent to it, but it was close enough to acknowldge and recognize that life comes in many forms and each form denotes happiness in a different form. It seems as though being on the balcony is like both looking through a magnifying glass and a microscope. It just depends on what your mind decides to wander to at a particular moment.