How Two Parts of My Identity Gives Me Education Access

The two identities I shared in my previous post were my race and my class. My Asian characteristics are what others immediately see when they first meet me and my class is what I think about the most. As a result of those two identities working separately, I gain access to education.  

Asians are smart. Of course she belongs in here.

Asians are innocent. It must be his fault instead.

These were some of the supposed maxims my teachers either said outright or implied.

My access is represented by the fact that even before I display my work, my teachers “see so much potential”. The bar is set very high for me and I am always encouraged to pursue a higher education. And my access is also represented when I do not feel persecuted as I walk in the hallways or the areas surrounding my school. I can go into the nice neighborhoods and not be mistaken for anyone but a student. I can be caught skipping class and I would be assumed to have a hall pass. In essence, I feel welcomed and supported by my school. My intelligence is never questioned as inferior and I am never seen as a troublemaker.

The poorer you are the more money you’ll get!

Everyone feels sorry for you when you’re poor!

These were the supposed maxims my single mother would tell me. Always taking the opportunity to criticize the country she was born in my mother would say, “This isn’t like my country; the US government is throwing money at you. Take it and go to college!”

Ironically, my socioeconomic status is supposed to prevent me from getting access to an education. But instead it opened up the grandest door of them all: being accepted into Haverford on behalf of the QuestBridge Scholarship.  

I have access to education because of the “model minority myth” which masks the struggles of Asians and Asian Americans everywhere. And I have access to education because we are so poor that at one point we couldn’t afford gas to put in our car.

So despite my access to education, why do I get this funny feeling whenever I see where my access comes from?