Thinking Sex: Representing Desire and Difference
A Feminist and Gender Studies Course
Bryn Mawr College, Fall, 2002

I also think that Sex Ed programs have been less effective mainly because of fear on the part of parents. While children and young adults may tend to be more liberal and accepting of the idea of a comprehensive sex ed program at a young age, many parents confuse informing kids about sex is in essence enabling them to have sex. This kind of thinking, pretending that if we wait until our children are old enough to be deemed (by adults) 'ready to learn about sex' , some teenagers (or children) will already have had sexual experiences.

I think it would be amazing to somehow workshop our class. I don't think i realized until today what an open dialogue we have and that, even in a college setting, that is probably rare.

It was really funny, actually, becuase the classroom was set up very much like my senior english and humanities classes, and the teacher actually got in trouble with the administration for having couches. She was told it would "encourage sexual behavior among children in the classroom"- because she won't notice that they're having sex while she's teaching, right? I think it actually says more about our administration than the kids- I mean, who was it again that thought to have sex on the couches?

I was telling you guys this week about The New York Times Magazine (August 11, 2002) title story called "Coincidence in an Age of Conspiracy," which I think is very important essay. It says, in part,

"Human beings are pattern-seeking animals...[conspiring] to make coincidences more meaningful than they really are....our brains fill in the factual blanks.....optical illusions.....prove that our brain is capable of imposing structure on the world...One of the things our brain is designed to do is infer the causal structure of the world from limited information. If not for this ability...a child could not learn to speak. A child sees a conspiracy...in that others around him are obviously communicating and it is up to the child to decode the method. But these same mechanisms can misfire....It's why we have the urge to work everything into one big grand scheme..We do like to weave things together. But have we evolved into fundamentally rational or fundamentally irrational creatures?"

I have enjoyed the readings in class. The sex ed curriculum written by Julia and Amanda has served as a good example for us. Some of the readings have shocked me in the sense that it is okay for children to touch each other. I mean I am an open person but I guess from where I am coming from, it is not right. I did enjoy the little skits we did in class about children learning more about each others bodies but at the same time when I think of the fact that I might have children one day, I would not want that to happen.

I am enjoying and loving this class to death. I love the fact that everyone in class is open and willing to listen to each other with a lot of respect. I am glad to be a part of this class:)

Sex Ed
Well-dressed, demure, jammed into those
politely arranged desks, it's hard to be
serious, but we are. No one even parts lips
to acknowledge what used to drive us crazy
in the back seats of cars, what kept us up
half the night reliving the last slow dance,
girl on her toes, guy bent at the knees
to press in against her.

The instructors speak precisely about
the importance of our children knowing the facts,
so surely none of us in our high heels and
neck ties is going to admit how our first mistakes
have suddenly blossomed so tender and lovely
we've been forgiven a thousand times,
a thousand times forgiven and repeated ourselves.

But fingering the graffiti on this desk,
I remember being braille to you, being read
like a steamy novel, and how those lessons
stayed with us, practical as driver's ed, those hours
of simulation behind the wheel of a parked car.
The truth is I don't regret having studied with you
though I do feel inarticulate, like an athlete
asked to speak in a room of kids, who has nothing
to say except, "practice, practice."

Once our daughter watched the cat in heat
yowl and slither across the floor, and without
looking up asked, would that happen to her. Sometimes
it isn't shame that makes us speechless. It's not
regret that makes me linger at the curb watching
her toss back her yellow hair and yank open
the heavy doors to school.
by Betsy Sholl

I really enjoy the interactive nature of this class, i hate being in classes where the professor never encourages us to interact with one another....

--pay me $18 (check made out to bmc) for the course packet

--review the archives for the two papers (1. how does your sub-group use language to talk about sex? and 2. what curriculum might you imagine to teach them what they don't yet know?) and make sure that BOTH of yours (or a summary of same) are posted. if not, send a copy (indicating clearly which group it belongs to) to jrichard@haverford.edu, the webmistress for serendip who is helping us all into the technological age....

--review the whole course archive and make sure that you have made a total of 6 postings (one for each week of the course so far; you can count your two papers (or summaries of your papers) in that total; if you are short, be sure to make the rest of the postings before you leave campus.

looking forward, on tuesday, to planning the remainder of the course w/ you all--
anne

All of the papers that have been turned in so far are up on the website, I believe. There is now a link from the home page to the second set. I fixed errors in some of the papers, but there are a number that still don't look perfect -- e.g., no paragraph breaks, lines are too short, no title, two titles, odd symbols in place of other punctuation like " and --. Most of these problems arise from not following the procedure below when they post:

1) If your paper is in Word or another word processor format, first save it under a different name (e.g., paper.txt) in format "Text Only" (NOT "Text Only with Line Breaks"). You do this in Word by choosing "Save As" from the file menu, changing the name, and where is says "Save as type:" (may be slightly different in different versions) choosing "Text only" from the pop-up menu. If, after doing this, the file doesn't look any different (i.e., it still has formatting like bold, etc.), then close the file paper.txt and open it again. It should open up without any formatting. If there is no space between paragraphs, you'll need to put in carriage returns. But don't add any formatting because it won't transfer.

2) Then, select the whole text but NOT your name or paper title or date, and copy it into the clipboard (Ctrl-C or Command-C).

3) Go to the posting web page and fill out your BRYN MAWR email address (it will be used for choosing the filename, not for emailing you), your full name as FIRST LAST (unfortunately, it won't work correctly if you include a middle name) and the paper title.

4) Inside the big box on the form, highlight the sentence in uppercase that says "REPLACE THIS LINE..." and paste the text from your paper in its place. Do not delete anything above that line. You should only be pasting the text of your paper into the box, not the title, your name, etc. Those will be added to your paper when it is processed based on what you entered in the fields above the text box.

5) Where it says "Paper formatted as:", leave it as "Plain Text" UNLESS you have put in HTML tags where you want space between paragraphs and line.

6) Click the "Submit Your Paper" button. You should see a confirmation back. Remember, your paper will not appear on the website until it the papers are processed, which will likely happen after most of the papers have been submitted.

On Tuesday i felt very uncomfortable with the whole process of deciding how to format the rest of class, and what the content will be. Since then i've been trying to figure out exactly what it was that bothered me so much. I think i was mostly concerned that the people who are more naturally vocal got to control the way the class would go - myself included in that group. It seems ineffective to plan with a group of 25 people in 45min and expect everyone in that group's voice to be heard and considered in even close to equal weight. Everything about the process felt very haphazard, rushed.

The least i can do here is offer a better plan but i can't really think of one. It seems that we can all bring to the class without having to all be a part of planning it. I worry about a lack of fluidity in the rest of the class. I'm supposed to be giving suggestions here.... I'll have to think about this over break.

I just wanted to express my discomfort with the situation and my worries about silencing people's voices. Perhaps i'm the only one who felt this way but just in case i'm not i thought i should share.

have a great break ladies! i'll miss your company!

A reminder that in class this Thursday we will be discussing our praxis sites: telling one another where we are, what is happening there or not, what frustrations/opportunities we're beginning to discover. Also due in class on Thursday (unless you've written me to say why not--AND what the details of your extension should be) is your third 3-pp. paper, introducing your praxis site (its clientele, its mission, its funding, its location, etc. etc.) to your classmates, and explaining what sort of language is used there to talk about sex (or not). This paper is intended to "lay the groundwork" for the next one, in which you will begin to sketch out a sex-ed curriculum for your site. You can't do that until you've scoped out the site itself, and what is already happening there (or not) re: the language of sex. Hopefully in doing this you will begin to articulate the sort of language that you will need to be employing in your final project.

Also: here's the schedule we worked out together in class today for the remainder of the semester (note to Bea, Nia & Iris: I need to know which group you are joining, and you need to let your group-mates know too)--

Th 11/7 SEX IN HISTORY/RELIGION--Lauren, Sheri, Sarah, Maggie
T 11/12 SEX AND THE LAW--Fritz, Elisa, Lindsay U, Jessica
Th 11/14 SEX IN THE MEDIA--Sarah, Emily, Chelsea, HY
T 11/19 MULTICULTURAL SEX--Tamina, Kathryn, Michele, 2002 TS Student.
Th 11/21 SEX IN ART--Deborah, Lauren, Monica
T 11/26 SEX IN ART 2--Jill, Nancy, Jenny

When I get a spare moment I'll update the syllabus on the course web site to reflect these additions.

Anne

By 5 p.m. on November 1st,
you also need to post AN ABSTRACT including
--a description your site w/ NO names/identifying markers
--an account of your initial reactions/issues
--a description of what you see as the problems/challenges in creating a curriculum for that location.

Anne

You also need to post by that deadline, on our on-line web forum,
AN ABSTRACT including
--a description your site w/ NO names/identifying markers
--an account of your initial reactions/issues
--a description of what you see as the problems/challenges in creating a curriculum for that location
AND THE SEX-ED BIBLIOGRAPHY [THIS AN ADDITION TO INITIAL INSTRUCTIONS--because this is a way for us to be helping one another along on this project].

Anne

Ok for me what's not working is that for the life of me I cannot remember to post. Damnit I do all the readings and I don't post my comments. I hope this isn't a lost cause yet.

Sarah and Chelsea talked about how Amanda and julia's sex ed curriculum was not so utopic. I really felt it was too utopic. I think it was a great curriculum and probably how sex ed ought to be taught. I think it may be too utopic because I grew up in a conservative area (A side note: I grew up in texas and I really cannot remember having a high school sex ed curriculum.) and I don't think we would have been allowed to present a currilcum which is so open minded to different kinds of sexuality. To me it is similar to how you can't teach evolution without teaching Christianity (like Christianity is the only religion or something) in some states. (I think it was a supreme court case in the last 3 years.. can't remember though). Unless it's a pretty progressive school, it is not going to want you to be so open minded.

As far as the class goes.. I am pretty sure that at that point I was thrilled with the class and had no complaints..
and i am super excited to write my own sex ed curriculum

Questions? email me or post.

from lauren h: "engendering america" (pp 60-63, 111-112, 118-125, 214-219)

from maggie: "memoirs of a geisha" (pp. 164-167, 280-291)

read what you can (you'll see from the pagination, above, that none of the excerpts are long ones, except the kama sutra, and sheri invites us to read around in that) and come w/ your questions-and-answers.

sheri, sarah, lauren and maggie--

would each of you plan to speak, please, for about 5 minutes about the text you selected for us to read: tell us where it came from, why you picked it, what dimension you think it adds to our explorations, what answers it offers, questions it raises for you--

then i'll see what i can do about braiding together a discussion that keeps all the balls in play (how's that for mixed metaphors?)

yes, yes, this feels unwieldy right now, but it also seems a GREAT example of an emergent system (my latest new enthusiasm, about which more later)--

VERY much looking forward to what emerges--

anne

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