Deborah's point about the consumerism that fuels our need to constantly upgrade our devices was definitely true -- coming from
Hong Kong, a place notorious for it's materialistic citizens, I cannot get over the long queues at the Apple store everytime a new
iWhatever comes out. That said, I'm not sure that Deborah's consequent point about the difficulty of having to constantly upgrade
our "toolkits" to be able to use each and every new device quite stands.

We're at an interesting point in time where technology is moving at a faster pace than at any point in history. But what we some-
times neglect to remember is that rather than to work in order to use individual devices, we should really focus on being able to use
a variety as new technology keeps pouring in. This means getting to the core of how these new tools work: our toolkits should really
focus on being able to intuitively switch between different mediums as well as be able to anticipate/adapt to new forms.

So obviously yesterday was an emotional class for me.  Part of me wants to do what was described in the reading- tell you all "I'm not crazy" or that it must have been a combination of stress and lack of sleep, but part of me knows that’s not it, at least not completely.  I know (and as I’m writing, my thoughts are less confident because they are permanent…I’m tempted to say I hope) that a lot of people on campus feel the same way as I do:  that they are never good enough,  that everyone is seems everyone one else was given these secret codes and you missed the memo.  What makes us feel this way? Part of me knows issues of self esteem really needed to be worked on from within. But if this a general campus feeling, than it is not just us, and what could be done to start to fix this?  How can we create an environment where we are confident in our intelligence? I don’t mind being challenged by my academics, but it’s another thing to feel beat up by them.  I’m also curious if this is the case within the Tri-Co and other institutions similar to Bryn Mawr?

I'm having a hard time telling you why I chose to use this as my avatar.  It wasn't a verbalized choice, but more an impulsive one.  The kind of choice you make that feels good for good reasons and doesn't come back to bite you in the butt.  This image may have to do with what I imagine silence to look like (see web event 1), but I do think that it also has to do with a certain amount of peaked interest one gets from the anonymity of the person in the cap.  It definitely reveals my aesthetic choices and what I find attractive.  I also just think it's a good picture.

Like most forms of self-expression, this avatar is one that I hope people to draw they're own conclusions from.  One through which people can better understand me and as the semester goes on, perhaps get a better sense of why I made this choice.  I hope to do the same as well.

If someone really wants me to explain myself in class, I'll try.

Here's the passage from the Adrienne Rich poem that I mentioned (and mis-quoted!) @ the end of our discussion today, about the "permanence" of our taking a stand (in barometer) or in writing (especially on-line). It's from "North American Time," and seems (to me) to have resonances for voice, silence and vision:

"Everything we write
will be used against us
or against those we love.
These are the terms,
take them or leave them.
Poetry never stood a chance
of standing outside history.
One line typed twenty years ago
can be blazed on a wall in spraypaint
glorify art as detachment
or torture of those we
did not love but also
did not want to kill

We move but our words stand
become responsible
and this is verbal privilege...."

As was visible from class on Wednesday, I was pretty frustrated with the Bohm reading and our conversation about it.  I interrupted a bunch which is immature.  I am sorry.  I thought about Wednesday’s class when I was at my sit spot yesterday evening and into today.  I think I’ve figured out two causes of my frustration:

I saw this video over the summer and it really affected the way I view arrests and policing in cities. I think in many ways it relates back to "The New Jim Crow" readings we did. I'd love to hear any thoughts you have in the video – it's not too long, and definitely worth watching.

http://www.nytimes.com/video/2012/06/12/opinion/100000001601732/the-scars-of-stop-and-frisk.html?ref=nyregion

As I stood in the garden adjacent to Perry House the sounds held most of my attention and although many of them came from man-made instruments, it was the sounds that came from the leaves, wind and non-human life that were most memorable.  To illustrate my response to my environment I am providing the following video.  It captured how musical and harmonized the outside "natural" world sounded to me that afternoon.  If I could find a piece of music that had a few instances of man-made sounds such as people talking, cars driving by and airplanes overhead, I would add that.  Maybe I'll keep looking.

I'm only part way through the reading for "The New Jim Crow" but I really wish this had been the texts for one of my American history classes in high school (for some reason, we did 1 year of world history, 2 years of American, and the last year was government).   It's ironic that even though I was exposed to two years of US History, a lot of the flaws of Americas past were left out; slavery was talked about in a very distant, unemotional way and to refer to something like the Trail of Tears as genocide would have been outrageous.  I went to a very racially diverse high school (although we were greatly segregated by AP and honors tracking), but when slavery was discussed a lot of white people complained: "What does this have to do with us? I hate when people say I'm racist just because I'm white, it's not my fault my great great grandfather owned slaves" and so on.  If you accused anyone of saying something racist, they thought you were being overly sensitive.  For example, in New England/Massachusetts, brown ice cream sprinkles are refered to as "jimmies".  My brother told me that this refered back to the Jim Crow laws and given it's racist origin, it was not something I should say.  I remember telling some of my whtie friends about it and their reaction was something like "when are people going to GET OVER slavery?".  I would like to think that had we read a book the The New Jim Crow, my peers and I would have been much more aware of how the history of slavery and racism still impacts us today.