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Bizarre Sleepwalking/talking incident

I am a 42 year old female. I had a few sleepwalking experiences during my adolescent years but nothing remarkable. The experience I had last weekend has scared me to death. I have had some new and very stressful situations arise in the past few months that have affected my sleep; generally causing me to sleep less hours a few days a week. I reside with my boyfriend, Daniel, and our roomate, Jamie. This is the first time in my 10 year old son's life that we have not lived together. My son, Max currently lives with my mother but close by. The week in question was a rough one for me as it began with my son's birthday, his party (which I was not to attend), Mother's Day (which also happened to be my mother's birthday and I had my period. For the three nights leading up to the incident I was having difficulty sleeping; getting an hour and a half at a time, a few times a night. Thursday night I went out to dinner with my mother, brother and son for his birthday - stress stress stress. Max's party was to be Saturday from 10 am - 12 pm. My mother was taking 4 other children and my son and had to leave her house by 9:30 am.

I remember nothing whatsoever of the whole sleepwalking/talking incident. I am only re-telling it as it was told to me. I trust the 2 people who saw me through it implicitly but also somewhere deep inside I know it is all true and it happened the way they said - it just feels right.

Apparently early Sat morning (1:30 am) I woke my boyfriend with a strong desire to have sex. I was frantic about it. I told him I wanted to have a threesome right then, that very night and got on my phone around 3 am calling local date lines to try to find someone to come to our house. This is absolutely the opposite of what I want in our relationship. We have discussed it several times and always agreed that participating in a threesome would most likely do more harm than good. Daniel said I would not put the phone down and swore this was what I wanted to happen. Thank God it did not. After having sex several times I retreated to the shower around 6 am; to his relief. He thought his trial was over ...

After returning to our bedroom I picked up a stack of motorcycle pictures he had printed and asked him rather roughly how the hell I was supposed to make the Spring Fling happen since Amanda had not even had the decency to give the pictures to Jeremy the day before like she was supposed to. Daniel pointed out that these were pictures of motorcycles he had printed. I slammed the bunch down in his lap and very hotly said Not these pictures Daniel but other ones kind of like them. I then dressed, left the room and went downstairs. 6:45 am

Our roommate Jamie's bedroom is on the ground floor. I entered his room without announcing myself, woke him up rudely and called him Ryan, another friend of ours. I demanded to know why Ryan had not gotten up on time to get the children dressed and ready to get on the bus. We would now be late. I blamed this on Jamie's girlfriend who I said was hiding under the covers although she was not at the house. To reiterate - 3 adults live in our house, no children. I told Jamie to get up and help me get the kids ready and pack their lunches because Ryan was going to be pulling up in the bus any minute. I then proceeded to call out approx 8 names of children who were to come out of Jamie's closet and get dressed. Daniel was downstairs with us by then and both Jamie and Daniel have said that I spoke to each child by name and knew where each one was standing or sitting at all times. I smiled at them and brushed their hair and tickled them all the while keeping their identities in order. The names were just random names not relatives or friends or friends kids' names. Guess I plucked them out of the back of my mind. Jamie, Daniel and I prepared 8 bag lunches while I made sure the kids waited in line at the front door. I then announced that we - the adults - would be having a meeting as soon as the bus departed taking the kids to the Spring Fling. I said I needed to get to the bottom of what occured to make Amanda and Jeremy turn on me at such a time. I have a cousin named Amanda but we are not close and have not had any sort of contact in at least 4 years. I once knew a Jeremy in high school.

At 8 am I announced that the bus was here and ushered the children out the front door, down to the end of the driveway. I waved at my neighbors Albert & Shirley, who I called Art & Gladys and also told them to get on down to the Spring Fling before all the good seats were taken. I stood there and handed each child into the bus that Ryan who was not physically there, was driving. I waved goodbye to the bus for a solid 5 minutes before storming back into the house crying because I felt Amanda and Jeremy had stabbed me in the back and were trying to ruin the Spring Fling I had worked so hard on. The guys had hidden the bag lunches and I never batted an eye about them but as soon as I called our meeting to order I became emotionally distraught that I had not set up and sent the required 3 first aid kits on the bus and to the Spring Fling. I found our only first aid kit in the kitchen and went on to dump Jamie's briefcase out on the floor looking for the others. The 3 of us live in the same house and are very good friends but NO ONE goes in jamie's briefcase but Jamie. Daniel told me that he had sent 2 of the first aid kits with Ryan in the bus but forgot to tell me. I bought it but was adamant about creating my own third first aid kit. I then informed Daniel that he had to go get dressed because we had to deliver it to the Spring Fling on time by 9:30. Jamie ran around and collected the random items I needed for the third kit - toothpicks, tampons, 12 sticks of sugarless chewing gum, a large bottle of Tums, a red bandana, a wad of toilet paper, a fork knife and spoon, an old Rick James cd, 3 quart sized baggies and 12 quarters. No band aids, no wipes, no first aid at all.

Daniel came downstairs at 9 am and I told him he had to ride with me to deliver the first aid kit to the Spring Fling because I needed to give him directions. He said he would drive me so I could re-check the first aid kit on the way and tell him how to get there. We jumped in the car and I directed him straight to my mother's house where we arrived unexpected at 9:25, just 5 minutes before she had to take my son and his friend's to his birthday party. I came in the backdoor and told her that Daniel was here and he wanted to apologize to her. She told me to leave because she didn't have time "to deal with my crap". She said later that "at that time" she had no reason to think something was wrong with me - I looked fine, talked fine, looked her in the eye and besides being there when I was not supposed to, I acted normal and calm. I went right back out the door and Daniel brought me home. I don't know how I got in and out of her house without my son seeing me.

Daniel got me into bed to watch a movie - don't ask me what - but halfway thru, around 2:30 pm I got up and said I was going fishing. So we went fishing and that is the very FIRST thing I remember. Casting my line and seeing the ripples in the water. Fishing has always been a great stress reliever for me. Daniel and I have been hitting the local ponds at least every other day since this happened.

Throughout the entire episode daniel was alternatively in tears and trying to talk me back to reality by asking questions that I would have had to answer rationally but I never went for it. Jamie was very shaken by the whole experience and when Daniel and I returned from fishing around 7:30 pm, the three of us just stood on the front porch in a group hug, crying and telling each other it was going to be alright, that we would do whatever had to be done - if anything - and it was then that I really really realized I had just gone through 13 hours walking talking and everything else but that I DO NOT remember a thing about it. Not a thing. And that scares me. The unusual sexual behavior combined with no memory of it is always creeping up on me. I know that Daniel and Jamie would never do anything to hurt me but what if this happens again and I am not at home or with one of them? The questions and doubt just keep piling up along with the anxiety.

The following day was Mother's Day & my Mother's birthday. I was supposed to go over there to cook out and spend time with my son. I was so exhausted that I backed out altogether. Later that night I sent my mother a series of text messages explaining what had happened and telling her that I was so scared. Her response was that Daniel should have called 911 immediately and had me transported to the nearest mental facility. She feels, like I do that the episode was caused by lack of sleep, added stress and extremely high anxiety.

This past Friday Daniel and I were supposed to pick up my son from school and stay on campus for a few hours during his school's annual Spring Fling. Wednesday night she called to confirm. Thursday night she called to say that she did not feel safe allowing Daniel and I to escort my 10 year old son to a school function attended by approx 150-200 people because I am obviously unstable. I was devestated and am still heart broken. This morning, Monday, my son called me and asked why I did not come to his school activity on Friday. Apparently, my mother went with him but did not mention my name or give a reason why I was not there. Max, being the little peacemaker that he is waited all the way until she left for work this morning to call and ask me why I did not come. Feeling heaps of sorrow, guilt and anger.

And so sleep continues to be elusive and the anxiety continues to pile up. I am so frightened this is going to happen again; like I am going to be caught in a vicious cycle. I do not have health insurance at this time and cannot afford to see my doctor. I asked both of my parents to help me out to pay for a check up and both refuse.

I am so anxious and scared and angry and hurt that I am frightened of waking up and hurting someone I love or damaging our home without even knowing I am doing it. I probably should have stayed away from some of the internet sites I visited trying to gather information. I try to sleep opposite times from Daniel as much as possible so he can watch me and make sure I am alright and he is alright. It feels so ridiculous and like I should be able to just shake this off and move on. For whatever reason, I cannot.

One of the scariest aspects of this is that under normal circumstances all of my friends and me included would have been making humorous remarks about the situation by now but we aren't. They are as worried as I am and that is disheartening. Don't get me wrong, there are about 5 people in this world who are truly my friends and I am truly blessed to have their support and concern. I have talked about it, cried an ocean over it and now written it all out. All of this has helped. Thanks to you for taking the time to read such a long winded account; I really wanted to be sure that I was thorough in my re-telling so that I do not forget anything because I certainly don't remember it.

Thanks be to God that I was at home with people who love me and saw me through the whole ordeal even as it it was confusing them and tearing them up inside. I love you with all my heart Daniel. Jamie - you are the best friend a gal could hope for.

I pray that this never happens to me again or to anyone else in this world. It is absolutely mind boggling.

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