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Recently there was a story on tv from someone who betted on the stock market all day. He had finally quit, because "the fear got bigger than the kick". He had believed his own explanation of his behavior even though he knew it was a lie. You can only lie to yourself for a limited time; after that, you start to get disgusted of yourself. "That is a very painful experience, that when you have all that you miss around you and that you are really dreaming of, and you stand crying in front of the mirror looking at yourself and saying: 'so my friend, are you the one who has it all? You have all that you want but here your stand!'" The therapist repeatedly said it was not the kick as much as the power that his client was hooked on. Addicts can turn like a leaf, standing in front of a machine and saying "absolutely never more", and then break down (tears) and start playing again. You are trying to get that high and that effort is taking up ever more of your time. You should try to rely on the logic of your feelings (guts) instead of the one in your drip-fed-conditioned brain. You may think it isn't much you are doing, but trying to give it up, shows you how much it really is!