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For our last reading in the “Ecological Imaginings” Emily Balch Seminar, we read The Lives of Animals by J.M. Coetzee.  In one of the reflections at the end of the book, Marjorie Garber states that the novel The Lives of Animals is not really about the ethics of killing animals.  Rather, that theme is a means by which the author tells us about academic discourse.  Our professor, Anne Dalke, commented that the way Marjorie Garber interprets Coetzee’s work could also describe our class.  The class is meant to teach us how to do academic work, but it is disguised as an environmental studies course (CITE??????).  Looking back at the semester, I find this idea to be true.  Yes, I have gained a new perspective about humanity’s relationship with the rest of the Earth, but what I have accomplished is a better understanding of how to perform on an academic level.  While I have improved since August, I have also learned how I can continue to improve as my time in Bryn Mawr College goes on.

            I feel that the area where I have most grown this semester is my writing.  I recently realized that the thing that has made the most difference in my writing is how I think about it.  In high school I would be so obsessed with getting a paper right that I would question every last word I was writing while I was writing it.  That led to very convoluted papers and a very stressed me.  Something that I have learned this semester is how to get out of my head while I am writing.  Instead of deciding exactly all of my ideas before the paper and trying to write them down like in high school, I have learned to let my ideas develop as I write the paper.  I think, as a result, that my writing has become much more natural and it has become easier to write an essay. 

The next step for my academic writing is to really contemplate my paper more after I have completed the first draft.  I notice that most of the issues with my papers now have to do with not having a clear thesis, having an abrupt conclusion, or having awkward phrasing.  I think that I could solve many of these problems if I changed my writing process slightly.  Instead of writing the first draft, quickly looking it over, and then sending it out, if I took a break between the initial writing and the editing process, it would help.  I think I am too close to my papers when I edit them immediately after writing them.  If I slowed things down a little, then I might be able to take the next step to making my writing improve even more.

The one area of class that I have not been adequately participating in is class discussions.  Particularly ones where the whole class is talking together, my voice is lost.  I am fine with other forms of discussion.  I have tried to make up for my lack of participation in class with posts on line. When we split up into small groups, I feel like I contribute to that conversation.  And, usually, I find I participate more immediately after the small group discussions.  The link between both of these types of discussion and why I speak more with them is the extra time I have to think.  When the entire class discusses a subject, I find I have things to say, but I am always still developing the idea in my head before someone else jumps in and turns the conversation in another direction.  Online and in smaller groups there is more time to formulate my ideas.  In class, I listen and I think but I do not speak.

            Now, I am not saying that these are good reasons for not speaking as much in class, but I am just stating that these are the reasons.  With them stated, it gives me the basis off of which I can decide how I can change.  I know it is my responsibility to learn how to insert my voice into a conversation.  I just need to be aware of my patterns and to practice being more active in class discussions.  I notice that I do manage to talk more when I am really interested in a subject, as in the discussions of Fun Home and the Barbara Smuts essay.   Whether it be taking notes during discussions, jumping into a conversation maybe before I feel I am ready, or bringing a conversation back to where it was once I have developed my thoughts, I think I can learn how to be more active in a class discussion.

             I think that this course has given me, if not the basic skills for being a college student, an elaboration on them.  I feel that I could have definitely survived my first semester without this class, but this class exercised and perfected the types of skills I will need in my years to come.  And, even though this course was at its core about developing academic behavior, I feel like my new perspectives about ecology I have read about are also very important.  I have gained a better appreciation for what is “nature” and “ecology” from the essays we have read and from my own observations of the world sitting in my spot for my site sit.  I do not know if these ideas have drastically changed me.  However, I think that as I proceed with my life I will continue to ponder how my actions affect the other beings on this earth.  So, I think that I leave this class with the inspiration to grow more, both academically and as a citizen of the world.

Works Cited

Coetzee, J.M.  The Lives of Animals.  Princeton: Princeton University Press, 1999.

Dalke, Anne. Ecological Imaginings.  Class.  Bryn Mawr College.  Bryn Mawr, PA. 

December 4, 2012.