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It should not be disputable that the buttered bread does not have the mean to twist itself between a supposed "front side" and a "back side" to keep its angular momentum to zero. Wether the thickness of it is too small if you consider it by the way it is sliced or its rigidity too high if you look at it through its longest part. It therefore would require the bread not to be cooked at all thus not being "bread" any longer but dough! And everyone knows that buttered dough will always fall right…
Back to the point, ever thought of cookin' a cat with or without butter and do the experience of letting it fall again? Even from more than a seven storey building chances are strong that it won't land on their feet… Quod erat demonstrandum: cooking "disturbs" matter and butter *is* healthy diet.