Self Evaluation and Reflection

Reflections on reflecting again, always

Reflecting on others’ reflections, narratives, orally spoken personal stories, you name it, it’s good that we are continuing to ask questions about the ways we do this. I still feel a gnawing in my mind about the wormhole that is defining all of these words and actions.  Everything we say feels very “meta” yet I know it is all too real, the things we are discussing.

I wanted to make a comment on what we have read in the story. I have actually read excerpts from this school in highschool but I don't think I was able to fully grasp what I was reading. I don't think I was able to fulling grasp who Fredrick Douglass was and the extreme tension that I feel reading it. I am also able to make the connection between literacy and how important it was for him in that time period. Literacy was a way out for him. I think that if he hadn't learned how to read and write, because literacy meant power which slaveowners did not want slaves to have, he wouldn't been able to even begin to think of a plan to find freedom or to even tell his story.

Writing is influenced by the writer’s experiences, in form of topic, characters, plot, placement, or even subconscious influence. Everything you do affects you in some way, when you write you reveal yourself in some way on that page, and as a result you expose some of every experience you may or may not have realized you faced. It’s uncomfortable to explicitly describe personal information, and you never need to do that in order to become a good writer, but a person does need to draw upon private experience in order to write. Writing cannot be limited to only to the things that a person has experienced without any influence from anything other than them.

Well, here we are at a bit of a standstill in schools of thought about how to respectfully reflect about the experiences and stories we hear about.

In both our Tuesday and our Wednesday on-campus discussions, more questions arose than answers. 

Some questions that stood out:   (I didn't jot these down verbatim, so if you recognize your thought, feel free to correct me)
    "Why didn't we first think to ask those who are non-B__ students if they were comfortable with sharing their writings, when our professors didn't hesitate to warn/ask us to use our writings to discuss in class, as opposed to just remaining online?"

    "Are we getting class credit for reflecting on other people's experiences? Is that moral?" 

The discussion that we had this week about reading for self-care really made me think. It made me think about how when I was younger picking up a book and reading or free-writing was something that I really enjoyed. Now picking up a book feels more like a chore and if I'm ever asked to free write or write about myself, I feel as I have nothing to say. It was interesting to find out that most of us in the class felt that exact same way. Today's school system does not stress the importance of reading and writing for self-care as much as it needs to me. This especially affects literacy.

My experience in this course's classroom(s) so far has been unique to me. Perhaps this is all framed by the dynamics of having two teachers, which is very new to me; I tend to be quite sensitive to the way my teachers act and seem to be feeling, so this change is very significant. Somehow, I feel like having two teachers has opened up the classroom a lot. Often times, when my professors attempt to shape the discussion or classroom dynamics, it can feel forced because there is always a sense of authority - students will tend to accept (not necessarily agree, I suppose) with the teacher's opinions. When this sort of "authority," if you will, is dispersed among two people, it seems to make these sorts of dynamics less intense.

Contemplating the past two weeks of this semester, some tension comes up. I anticipate that tension will be a common theme throughout the semester just based on the real systems, tending to be extremely flawed, that we live in and study and attempt to break down. I appreciate the classmates who have posed questions that many would never ask in a group class setting. The assigned piece of writing that has resonated with me most thus far is  ”Accomplices, Not Allies: Abolishing the Ally Industrial Complex.” The writer defines different Ally-types, such as Parachuter, “missionaries with more money,” and Floaters, those who hop from one issue to another and are action-junkies. There are many other Ally-types described.

           For our collective exhibit, I researched oriki, or praise songs, which are part of the Yoruba oral traditions. I specifically looked at the oriki poem about Ọlọ́wẹ̀ of Isẹ̀ , who is considered by many art historians and art collectors to be the most influential Yoruba artist of the 20^th century. I researched how Ọlọ́wẹ̀ of Isẹ̀ made his doors and some of the carving techniques he used, such as high and uneven relief work.

Dear Anne,

Changing our environment, altering our identities! I was so excited when I was allocated this class for my Emily Balch seminar. I didn’t know what it entailed nor who my colleagues would be but still, I was so happy that my family members didn’t have peace that day because of me, who apparently was trying to explain to them so that we could share in the joy. Looking at things right now, I must say that deep down I am happy even more than I was back then. Happy because of this journey we partook together which I believe has been key to my final academic path in life and more so, because of the memories; good or bad that I will forever carry with me.